Thursday, December 10, 2009


This past summer I stayed on Puerto Rico for a couple weeks writing poetry. Every day, I would go to the beach for inspiration and write. I’d walk through the steamy streets of San Juan holding a manila folder in one hand, and an i-pod in the other. This trip was a wonderful experience, but it also meant that for a couple of weeks I would be separated from my sweetie. It was a great time to reflect and try to write something really heart centered, but also a time of missing my hunny.

One day while I was on the beach, I found myself experiencing a writer’s block; so with i-pod in hand I walked into the water. I heard the song Magnificent by U2. I was standing in aqua colored clear blue water, feeling the warm white tipped waves crash upon me, as I stared out into the clearest sunny sky, and felt the Caribbean breeze caress me. Though I had loved this song, the surrounding environment caused a deeper experience with the lyrics and the music.

I recall experiencing feeling free and peaceful; I thought to myself, “wow, this is what we all live for only love.” In this moment, I felt as if anything was possible. That is what love does for us, it make us feel and believe that anything is possible. Even if we have been hurt by relationships before, something in our basic human nature desires closeness with another human being.

For myself, I have had my fair share of relationships that lacked equilibrium and turned out to be painful, but some how-somewhere I still believed that there was someone for me. Though I became extremely close to being jaded, and may have experienced a few moments of that thinking, something still drove me when I thought of obtaining that type of connection.

So back to the song…why did it resonate so deeply for me? First of all, through the years I have had to learn skills, and I am still learning skills in healthy communication and connection with my partner. When my partner and I started dating, we both carried some deep wounds into the relationship (based on past experience), but we both had hope and desired to find emotional intimacy with each other. This leads me to the line of the song, “only love can leave such a mark,
but only love, only love can heal such a scar” (U2 Magnificent).

Getting close to my partner and trusting that we had something special was difficult, but I found that “falling into” what we had allowed for not only deeper emotional intimacy and connection, but also deep healing. However, I must say that you and your partner need to be on the “same page” and be willing to earn stepping into the gentle space of intimacy. It takes work from both parties. It will take challenging your fears, being open and vulnerable, accepting that love will at times cause you pain, and be willing to be authentically you. It really is work to get there and stay there, but if you can get there it is truly “Magnificent.”

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